Dear Fox and Hanger,
I feel like I lost myself to the yoga pant ! Ever since I became a mother I’ve forgotten how to get dressed . Some days , I’ve forgotten to brush my teeth! Honestly, I can’t remembe the last time Ive put time and effort into caring for myself. I’m so drained!
Oh God. Admitting that to you feels exposing My baby is a couple months shy of a year and I feel a shift . I guess that’s what made me realize I had a problem. Please help me.
-Lost in Babyland
First off, I want to mention how much I appreciate you reaching out for help. Before I offer you my advice, I’d like to congratulate you on surviving the most emotionally and physically challenging time of your life. Talk about draining!
As a mother myself, I look back on those early years as ,”Heaven mixed with Hell”. The good news is, it DOES gets better. Hang in there ! Something DOES happen at that one year mark that feels like a restart button.
Until then, you are in survival mode . So focus on the time period you are in as apose to where you are going. Remember , until you reach a year, you are in survival mode . What I am going to suggest doesn’t involve a list of ten basic wardrobe rules. It doesn’t entail you creating a clothing budget or coming up with a fashion inspiration board .
The first step involves getting rid of all those maternity clothes that live in your closet . Toss em! Don’t worry, If your having another , you’ll want to start fresh. This includes: ANYTHING that was packed in your luggage to-and-from he hospital. Also, crusty nursing bras, granny panties , ratty sweats …. Basically, any clothes that hold toxic memories from those first eight weeks .
Once you are rid of all trauma pre and post babe, it’s time to admit that your self-care is in a state of emergency. You must be your biggest priority ! Remember, you take care of yourself and everyone benefits.
This may involve purchasing a journal and jotting down all those grooming rituals that have disappeared ( or perhaps never existed !) By reintroducing( or birthing) these simple forms of self-care you will be able to tackle that wardrobe by one year .
Next, you will want to make sure that you have all the tools in your uterine tool belt! I want you to make sure you get a great under eye concealer . Mac has a great one, or bare minerals ( three step kit) can do wonders for them bags .
Also, make sure you own a tinted sunscreen and a colored gloss or tinted Chapstick . It will make you feel like a million bucks . Don’t forget to savor and luxuriate in the shower. It’s amazing how much a momma can experience in just five minutes! (Wink wink) At night , make sure you aren’t forgetting about your nightly groomingroutine(wash,tone,moisturie ) .
These tips can make a world of difference . Woman can age tremendously during these first couple of years . Remember this mantra : Mother yourself, so you can mother your children.
As for that yoga pant problem of yours, be gentle with yourself. Until you reach that one year mark, I want you to focus on the skin your in! (like literally…a Clarisonic brush is magical and worth every penny !)
treat yourself to the little things: a scented moisturizer, a pedicure , waxing , or blowout. Whatever a treat means to you, make sure you gift yourself daily .
I hope my letter helps. And I hope you know what a wonderful job your doing… Like an A+. The fashion vortex is real girlfriend …. But you don’t need to take that on just yet . Good luck mamma and please don’t hesitate to email me anytime @email@example.com (even if it’s at 3’in the morning !)
Fox and Hanger